think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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