Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
