the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
