Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
