After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Randomize
