Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
