WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
