I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
