i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
