How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
