i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i out mim tonsoeep
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