I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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