worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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