its not stalking. its research.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
