In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
