Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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