i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.