Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize