We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
