yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
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