just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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