Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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