My friends, they love my intelligence
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Randomize