Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
