What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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