return my video game
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
