So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
