Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants http://tfl.nu/4te8
  Replies (6) Good night (2053) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  Awkward

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend (1-727): Awkward http://tfl.nu/j0vr
  Replies (13) Good night (648) Bad night (3142)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates. http://tfl.nu/cs1d
  Replies (24) Good night (1619) Bad night (4121)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately. http://tfl.nu/s9fu
  Replies (17) Good night (912) Bad night (4831)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night http://tfl.nu/hkfs
  Replies (43) Good night (10106) Bad night (3036)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing. http://tfl.nu/kg0l
  Replies (15) Good night (2986) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now. http://tfl.nu/5jdl
  Replies (13) Good night (5875) Bad night (1050)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them. http://tfl.nu/ibul
  Replies (5) Good night (3398) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt. http://tfl.nu/gq2z
  Replies (9) Good night (1029) Bad night (1253)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame. http://tfl.nu/s2ml
  Replies (3) Good night (980) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding http://tfl.nu/2362
  Replies (7) Good night (574) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned http://tfl.nu/t8ci
  Replies (8) Good night (885) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him http://tfl.nu/0mnm
  Replies (2) Good night (901) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/luvf
  Replies (4) Good night (701) Bad night (200)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor http://tfl.nu/zg4s
  Replies (1) Good night (344) Bad night (356)

Randomize