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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this

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  25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...

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• (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?

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• (562): View more from California

  Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.

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  25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.

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• (606): View more from Kentucky

  Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.

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• (585): View more from New York

  I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.

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• (415): View more from California

  "Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...

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