I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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