if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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