Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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