The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm just crazy horny about you
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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