last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
