let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
