I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
