Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize