Don't you send me to vm
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize