On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
She's the barista slut.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Randomize
