Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
