You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
