My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
