She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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