Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize