p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
