so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
