is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
