we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
