Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize