Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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