Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
So much Jack, so little girl.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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