I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
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He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
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Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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